Change.

 I recalled being able to blog weekly, this was all before the existence of instagram and social media. I love being able to share my life with people,  the good and also the bad but obviously not all. I’m pretty much an open book and what you see is basically what I am. I have my lows that only the people close to me get to see but I sleep on it and totally forget it the next day. I forgive easily and my mind is like clockworks its always thinking but never really capable of carrying forward an idea long term. I lose focus quite easily which I’m trying to sort myself out currently.
 
Almost missed my flight today, 5 days in Jakarta is enough. I’m not bored I just find the fact that traffic makes my day unproductive, not being able to be outdoor that much makes me lethargic. This week was not to bad I got to do what I wanted but obviously if I had patience I could have done more but sitting in traffic with the car jerking every minute is not the best way to read a book without cursing.
 
I can’t wait to get home to snuggle with Sam, I use to think I can’t live without someone and could never be on my own in another country with without my other half, even if its 2 days apart. I guess I grew up and loved myself more to spend time with myself.
 
All this obviously did not happen overnight, failed relationships, getting hurt and being emotionally abuse, cheated and also cheating on my past relationships made the person I am today. Yes I admit it I’m no petals and bubbles but I choose me and I choose to accept my flaw and love it all, but obviously I wouldn’t be cheating anymore because I’ve learn to respect myself and my other half.
 
Have I had issues with my body ? obviously! Else I wouldn’t be where I am today. I have a bulletproof solution to your problem if u do have any issue in life, be it body image, love life, you are bored, what ever issues you can think off! If you don’t like it change it! No one’s going to help you but yourself obviously.
 
In the past 7 years here are some of my changes I made!
 
Did not like staying at home ! so I moved out, and don’t tell me you can’t afford it! If you can’t stand it so much you would have 3 odd job paying for your rented apartment shared by 10 people! Make it work!
 
Did not see the world because my parent could not afford it! I travelled more! I work and travel work and travel and made sure I consistently keep travelling 3-5 countries every year!
 
Did not think I was giving my dog a good life! I was at work all the time and yes I bought him and I was being unfair so I gave him up, you can call me irresponsible but giving him up means he had a chance to have a better life as a dog!
 
Picked up the courage to walk out my 5 years long relationship because I was done being cheated on, not once or twice but way to many times. I only stayed because I was comfortable and stupid.
 
Learning to say no !
 
Learning to say yes!
 
Make it happen, I stopped talking instead I started doing.
 
Well this are just some example what I am trying to say is. If you don’t like it CHANGE.